im madison i like thg and dogs
I was just explaining to my friends how bald eagles are like pigeons in Alaska.
IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”
oh man, i love receiving unedited final drafts:
cracks me up every time
I just got a package from my sister and its a crossbow that shoots bolts which is cool but I put it together anD IT FIRES THEM AT ABOUT 800 FPS I COULD HAVE KILLED MY ROOMMATE I ALMOST SHOT IT AT HIM BUT I HIT A METAL CHAIR THAT THE BOLT WENT THROUGH
I took the metal tip off so its just a plastic bolt
aND ITS STILL PRETTY DEADLY
Where did your sister acquire this.
things that will always sound sarcastic
- good for you
- thanks a lot
- yeah right
- nice to know
- way to go
- ok buddy
Not if you say ‘man’ at the end
ok buddy man
I might not have thought that last one through
the thing to realize here is that conservatives find the idea of paying workers a livable wage so absurd that they make hyperbolic comparisons like this
because fifteen dollars an hour and a hundred thousand dollars an hour both mean the same thing to them; more than you deserve
^That commentary is very important.
ariana grande needs to calm down
Daily Show correspondent Michael Che tries to find a safe place to report from.
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What a time to be alive…
This show received 42 emmy nominations.
my anaconda don’t…
my anaconda don’t…
My anaconda dont’ want none unless you got buns hun
Dudes who actually react when you giving him the suck up.
Bless y’all. I love guy-moans. I love when he start cussin under his breath and shit. He start looking for shit to hold onto, grabbing my hair, can’t figure out how his life got to this point and shit.
That kind of dude is fun to suck and fuck.